Fibromyalgia: Sign Me Up!
A good friend of mine used to laugh about fibromyalgia, explaining that it’s a fake disease. Now that I’ve read about it, I am not only convinced that it’s fake, but that I have a severe case of it myself!
While the pharmaceutical companies have finally started advertising a drug to treat it, one of the doctors who first identified the ‘disease,’ Dr. Frederick Wolfe, now doubts its existence. He and other doctors point out that the condition actually worsens once a patient has been given the diagnosis, which causes them to “obsess over aches that other people simply tolerate.”
The FDA has approved the use of Pfizer’s “Lyrica” for fibromyalgia, and its side effects are severe weight gain and dizziness. This seems like a good plan. The fibromyalgia patient can then seek treatment for the new ailments, ad infinitum.
The fact that fibromyalgia sufferers tend to also be afflicted with other nebulous diseases like irritable bowel syndrome and chronic fatigue, makes it very inviting. Basically, its victims feel achy all over, with pains that don’t respond to advil or even vicodin. There’s no way to prove you have fibromyalgia, or that you don’t. But if it’s recognized as a disease, you can go around complaining all the time! I love it!
Many years ago, the term neurasthenia would have covered not only fibromyalgia but Epstein Barr syndrome, chronic depression, and a host of other ailments as well. The first time I saw the word in the dictionary, I thought Bingo! I’ve got it! And to a greater or lesser degree, so do many of the people I know.
We’re tired, achy, bloated, depressed, congested, irritable, listless, itchy, anxious and short of breath. We hate to work or walk up stairs. When it’s not our stomach, it’s our head. “Lyrica!” It’s like a song to our brains from the loving musicians at Pfizer. And they’ll love us even more when we’re fat and dizzy!
January 16th, 2008 at 7:52 pm
My sister-in-law had whatever it is pretty bad. She’s not a slacker. It killed her to be at home and I know she was in a lot of pain every day. It did get a lot better when she left her Job in Hell, so maybe it is psychosomatic, which doesn’t make the symptoms any less painful.
Don’t you think there is a tendency to minimize “women’s diseases”?
January 18th, 2008 at 2:06 pm
I remember when I was growing up. The doctors all took the position that cramps during menstruation were all just a figment of women’s imagination. I don’t know about you, but my imagination makes me want to curl up and die every month. Amazing that ibuprofen makes it all better. I suppose that’s just a psychological crutch though, right? It couldn’t possibly be something real because men don’t have the problem and women can’t even agree on the symptoms or their severity.
The recent talk about fibromyalgia just reminds me of my “imaginary” monthly pain. I had the good sense to know even back then that those doctors were spouting horseshit. And that makes me more sympathetic to the folks suffering almost debilitating pain and less than sympathetic to the folks calling foul/hijinks.
(I rewrote this several times trying to make it a little less agressive, but apparently I have strong feelings on the matter. Heh, who knew?)
January 18th, 2008 at 5:19 pm
I hear you. I do believe that women’s ailments have been attributed to ‘hysteria’ or whatever. Maybe that’s why doctors used to be so quick to remove a uterus.
I also believe more and more that the mind/body link is at work in most illness. Not cancer or anything like that, but most of our organs are so reactive to constant stress, it’s no wonder we feel awful.
I wonder whether one’s attitudes about cramps have anything to do with how one perceives them? Not that they are imaginary, just that dread and/or depression makes them worse?
I also belive that some nervous systems are simply more sensitive to everything….cold, heat, pain, etc. Thus, we do literally feel things that others may by oblivious to. Think of the autistic kids who can’t stand socks with seams…..
January 23rd, 2008 at 10:08 am
One of the interesting things about this “disease” is that one the most effective treatments is group therapy. During this group therapy, participants are not allowed to mention their fibromyalgia, they are only allowed to talk about their day-to-day problems. The man who coined the word “fibromyalgia,” has since redefined it as “extreme selfishness.”
January 24th, 2008 at 11:21 am
Interesting - so the non-judgmental (extreme selfishness, wow) version of that would be more like what Sister Wolfe was saying (And Suebob too with her SIL). A link to mind/body stress that gets expressed in pain.
I’ve had a friend for close to 20 years. When I first met her, she was stressed in a bad work situation and had constant health issues. Depressed immune system, constant colds/flu, and depression on top of it. It all seemed to go away when she found a better work situation. I didn’t really put it together until the work situation (along with life this time) went bad again and her health started to nose-dive.
It’s amazing what our minds can do to us, isn’t it?
January 27th, 2008 at 7:51 am
Well, my Mom says she has it a little
February 11th, 2008 at 2:48 am
Fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue syndrome are probably the most common complaints that I see from people who are mostly unhappy in their lives or their jobs. It is usually the same demographic, and same economical class of patients. Most are usually women that have some underlying depression issues, and the few men that I have encountered have been nothing more then drug seekers. In response to Graham, everyone has “fibromyalgia” at some point or another, it translates to “muscle pain”. The sad part of our pathetic society is that that we have become such a “fix it with a pill” society that we we only mask the symptoms and never address the problem. If you are having a heart attack, I could give you enough morphine that you would forget about the pain of the MI, however, the problem still exists, I haven’t done you any favors. If you believe that you “suffer” from fibromyalgia, look a little deeper.
March 28th, 2008 at 12:02 pm
Pretty sure it’s not fake. It’s not “cramps” so much as a neurological dysfunction where people experience pain in their skin, muscles and fascia. I’ve treated people with it through massage (where I can barely touch them, and certainly can’t give what you’d consider a typical massage) and seen the pain register in their faces.
I also have a friend with several neurological disorders that are toxin-induced,a dn he began experiencing fibromyalgia symptoms over time. He had plenty of access to meds before the diagnosis, and didn’t find them to be helpful. So not sure what to do with the last comment.
May 11th, 2008 at 11:04 pm
As a journalist and medical writer specializing in CFS/ME and fibromyalgia, I am disturbed that there are still people who don’t believe these illness exist, despite loads of scientific evidence. These illnesses ruin the lives of millions of people. They can cause constant 10/10 level pain, which has nothing to do with “not tolerating normal aches.” There are actually clinical markers for fibromyalgia - but you wouldn’t know about it, because you’re more focused on making fun of disabled people than doing your research.
“The fact that fibromyalgia sufferers tend to also be afflicted with other nebulous diseases like irritable bowel syndrome and chronic fatigue, makes it very inviting. ” Chronic fatigue is not a disease. It is a symptom which can accompany fibromyalgia. People with fibromyalgia also often suffer from CFS/ME, a serious neurological illness, which can be progressive and sometimes even fatal.
May 11th, 2008 at 11:37 pm
I only make fun of disabled people to the extent that I make fun of myself.
Good luck with your book.
May 20th, 2008 at 5:09 am
I find it truly amazing that people without this affliction say that it is ‘in my head’. If that’s your opinion…’please cut off my head’. I have to live with this everyday…..it’s debilitating, excrutiating, unbearable pain that makes it so difficult to get up in the morning, to want to do anything at all….I go to work everyday, I drag myself thru the day, go home and attempt to make dinner for myself and my husband, keep the house semi-clean(no energy at all) and am ready to give up on life as I once knew it. I’m taking Lyrica….does some good, I’m not crazy about it, doesn’t do that much good most days, making me fat and forgetful……You know I would give anything not to have this…..all I ask each day, ‘why me?’ What did I do to deserve this…..fibromyalgia, I don’t care what it’s called, I’m not me anymore….something has invaded my body, my mind, and taken away my spirit……..unless you live with it you cannot possibly understand it….your opinions don’t mean anything to me…an opinion isnt going to solve this puzzle……I have another friend with this stupid thing, she can’t even work anymore…..we are both intelligent women. Can someone out there help us?
May 27th, 2008 at 10:01 am
It’s a joke, at least at my workplace.
I work in a factory and I have several of these people as my coworkers. As long as they have a lazy job, they are fine, as soon as they have to work on a machine, by the time they get moving along they say ‘I’m going to have to take an FMLA day tomorrow, my fibromyalgia is acting up’. It’s called ‘I haven’t used these muscles because I have been sitting on my butt for so long that I forgot what it feels like to work’. That is like a person who has never run a mile in his life then just deciding they are going to get up and do a marathon with out any thought to it, then waking up the next day and wondering why they are sore, that is not fibromyalgia, that is called sore from physical exertion.
Not trying to gender-ize it, and it is going to make me sound like a woman basher regardless of me saying that, but all the people at my work who are using that medical excuse to get out of actual work are woman.
I believe that there is some truth in the disease and that some people do honestly have it, but I also believe it is a disease that is easy to fake in order to gain some sympathy from others or just to plain old steal money from the employer so that you can get receive a paycheck without putting any work in to earning it.
June 1st, 2008 at 10:41 am
FIBROMYALGIA IS OH SOOO REAL!!! I was diagnosed “FINALLY” back in 1998. This was, of course, after seeing Doctor after Doctor, for over a year while my body degraded into complete “BED RIDDEN” form. It was a combination of the Fibromyalgia not being correctly diagnosed & the many different drugs each Doctor I saw prescribed to me!
Most of that 1st year is remembered in bits and pieces as most of it I was in such a deep drug fog, many STILL wonder how I made it through! But not only did I somehow live through it, I finally found REAL HELP in a couple different places… I also lived through many nightmares over the next decade. You know the ones I speak of if you have FM… Being told everything from…”Fibro does not exist, so you need a head Dr.” to one of my all time favorites “We don’t cater to drug addicts here, so you may as well return to the state you came from!” Oh Yeah!! That was an Asian ER Doc at South Lake Tahoe, CA in 2001
I have met 100’s of fellow suffers since my Diagnosis, including 2 of my life long best friends who have since been diagnosed, and one thing seems to be universal amongst us all…. “LACK OF INFORMATION AND SUPPORT”. THAT is one reason of many that brought me to the decision to write a book on the subject in the winter of 2006/2007 called…
“Fibro-My-What?!” It is different from other books on the subject for one reason… I did not hold back on my personal, albeit semi-sarcastic, views and opinions on all I found during my research.
If you are at all interested in checking out “Fibro-My-What?!”, I invite you to check out my official web site:
http://www.fibromywhat.com
Through my website, you can send me email if you have any questions that you think I may be able to answere for you. There is a lot of information there on the site also… just flip through the pages…
July 5th, 2008 at 8:53 am
So, is Fibro contageous? Because two of the “sufferers” have friends that also have it, and Mary Ann has not 1, but 2 life long friends that also have it. Is it more likely that birds of a slacker feather sit and loaf together?
July 19th, 2008 at 10:50 pm
My god those people who want to make fun of this I will give you my address and i’m sure i’ll have enough energy to give you what for. How dare you. You talk about these people being selfish and lazy. I have worked all my life and by the way still intend to. You don’t have a heart and you want everyone to do the work for you so that you can sit down on your bum and do nothing. Just stop depressing all sufferers with your sick attitute. You might find that one day you suffer from something and I hope only then people turn their back on you.
I am married with children. I work full time and my employer is very happy with my performance. I very rearly have a day off. I come home and cook, clean, iron, do washing and still try and have a social life. What do you do???? I know people like you and i’m more sad for you than I would be for anyone with Fibro at least one day they may find a cure. How do you cure someone like you.
July 29th, 2008 at 4:37 am
It’s weird that all these middle aged women and their best friends have the same “disease”. It’s seems most of then are overworked and underappreciated. Well “Fybro” seems like a good outlet for them since they are so unhappy in their personal lives. I wish doctors and pharmaceutical companies would be straight with the public and not cater to these unhappy women. But on the other hand, these are not the type of women who can be told they are faking so maybe this is the first step in shutting them up.
August 9th, 2008 at 7:53 pm
Will you must have a small penis that’s all i can say.
August 9th, 2008 at 7:55 pm
And what exactly are we faking Will. You can’t fake having a small penis can you I suppose it’s the same thing.
August 19th, 2008 at 1:14 pm
I agree with one of the above posters, these women are not making their pain up, however, there is a root cause for their physical problems, and in my experience with friends it seems to be mental and stress related. Worried sick to the extreme if you will.
August 21st, 2008 at 9:48 pm
Just when you thought people, men in general, couldn’t get more insensitive, ignorant, and downright lame…you read comments from baffoons such as yourselves. Part of me wants to feel sorry for you, because you just can’t fix stupid. The other part of me wishes I could reach through the monitor and pull your gonads out through the orafaces you call mouths. I’d love to poke fun at you while watching you sqeak in Soprano.
It appears that the MEN complaining about WOMEN who say they have Fibromyalgia are jealous because they have to work and wish they could stay home and be lazy. You’re bitter at women because of the Women’s Lib movement. They certainly didn’t do us any justice by wanting to declare to the whole world, “I am WONDER DYKE, hear me roarrrrr!” While I loathe the women’s liberation mentality, and homosexuality, I can now at least get a glimpse of what made them WANT to assert their liberation and turn into lesbians.
Not only do you men lack in the intelligence department, me thinks there is some “little man syndrome” sufferers as well. Good luck with that, and God forbid, your wives, sisters, mothers, or anyone else you love is diagnosed with Fibromyalgia, some moron such as yourself, doesn’t come along and tell her she’s just faking because she’s lazy. KARMA baby, KARMA.
September 19th, 2008 at 8:16 am
Above poster says: “There are actually clinical markers for fibromyalgia”
Huh? What markers? There ARE no markers. All you have to do is say you hurt in 16 or 17 places the doc pushes. That’s easy, just say it. Then you are golden. Yes, people have been declared disabled because of this, think about that next time you pay your taxes.
Let’s be honest, lets call FM what it is: “depression with somatization”. Nothing more than that.
BTW, I am a practicing physician, a Fellow of the American College of Surgeons for 18 years.
When a new patient lists FM on their interview sheet, you know you have an emotional whiner that’s unlikely to respond to any treatment. That’s a little doctor secret; they tip their hand.
October 2nd, 2008 at 4:02 pm
Please don’t be offended, this may be a unique experience.
I may know someone who is lieing.
I will refer to this person as him/her, s/he or his/her appropriately, as to protect his/her identity.
I am close to someone who claims to have FM. S/he developed symptoms only days after his/her last child moved out on its own (empty nest syndrom?).
S/he was wheelchair bound emediately (not by a Dr.) and later switched to a walker because s/he couldn’t aford to continue renting the wheelchair.
This person also claimed a few times to have had his/her knees buckle and/or lose the ability to move one leg when walking with a friend as well as having bad reactions to scented products while walking in the grocery store.
S/he even went so far as to “lose the ability to talk correctly” (jiberish or just sounds). I don’t remember what brought it on but I was the one to call the paramedics and follow him/her to the ER and translate. The doctor pulled me aside after the exam and asked me if s/he had a history of mental illness. - This person told me years before this that s/he was in therapy for multiple personality disorder and severe depression from traumatic events. This person is also a recovered alcoholic and has not held a serious/steady job since his/her seperation from his/her spouse and has been supported by family and child support ever since.
The FM only came up when the child support stopped and the family (her last child was paying half the rent) could no longer support him/her.
I strongly disbeleive this person to have FM. It developed over night and out of nowhere.
I believe that s/he is using it to be on Disability and for empathy from family (they aren’t close).
I also belive that s/he is so mentally disabled/ill (I believe s/he really suffers from Munchausen Syndrome because of the ER trip and everything else.) that it wouldn’t matter if I addressed the situation with the Authorities because s/he would be on Mental Disibility anyway. I just needed to get this off my chest.
What would you think/feel in my situation?
October 2nd, 2008 at 4:09 pm
Zulu’s only defence is that the disbelievers have a little penis.
What does that say about her and her evidence (or lack there of).
October 8th, 2008 at 9:27 am
you are a complete a-hole! Fibromyalgia is not fake. My aunt,grandmother, and mother have this disease and doctors have recently diagnosed me with it. I’m 14. It is a genetic disease the causes millions of people world wide to suffer, and someone as idiotic as you should be diagnosed with it….then let’s see how “fake” it is.
November 9th, 2008 at 6:33 pm
Wormwood claims he’s a “physician” God protect any unsuspecting patients of his. He sounds like the biggest quack if you ask me. Many INTELLIGENT Drs take FM seriously and treat it. He sounds like he has zero compassion and without that you might as well retire. Maybe he’s an old fart that should retire. What an idiot. I’d LOVE to be able to check to see how many complaints there are at the state regulatory agency against him where he practices. LOL
November 10th, 2008 at 8:06 pm
Fibromyalgia is a fake disease. It is used by people who want attention, are lazy, and want to get high on pain pills. I’ve heard the excuse, and I don’t believe it. The only doctors who “treat” it are the ones who want to sell pharmecuticals. Read the articles. It’s an excuse. Like non-descript lower back pain. Oh and my penis is quite large. Please learn how to spell it makes you appear uneducated, ignorant or simply misinformed. Cheers
November 17th, 2008 at 6:03 am
Brad, you appear to be the one who is uneducated and misinformed about FM. I have FM, I do NOT want attention, I am NOT lazy, and I don’t even take pain pills. I’ve never even asked for them. My doctor attends seminars on FMS all the time. He works with me, my Rheumatologist, and through diet and Physical Therapy.
There are hundreds of doctors around the country that take FMS seriously and do all they can to make life easier for those like me, who would give their right arm to not be in constant pain - 24/7.
I manage the best I can. I do what I can, when I can…many times my husband gets upset with me because I push myself too hard. I have FM, it doesn’t have me. Until you’ve lived even 1 hr in the body of a person who suffers from this debilitating, chronic pain, you cannot speak authoritatively on the subject. Trying to do so only makes you sound ignorant and bitter.
Maybe your wife or mother has it and you’re resentful??? I’m sorry if that’s the case. It’s not fun, and it can be frustrating for family members. However, saying it’s “fake” doesn’t make them feel any better. It’s as real as Diabetes, Cancer, or any other disease documented by the AMA.
There may be people that have it or claim to have that have mental problems, but that’s not the case for everyone. I am well educated, motivated, ambitious, and when I’m able…very energetic.
November 19th, 2008 at 7:10 am
I’ve been dx’ed with “fibro” and it is complete and total BS. Yes, I have all the triggerpoints, yes, my body hurts and I can hardly move and I’m stiff all the time, but I do not need antidepressants and anticonvulsants and other potent drugs.
I get up and go to work because i can make a hell of a lot more money working than sitting on my rump waiting for a disability check. Oh and it’s really funny how the poor suffering afflicted never miss a party or a shopping trip. Just knock it off. Get an education and a little self-respect, will ya?
It’s a mental disease more than anything else. In that sense it is “real”. Get well soon.
November 21st, 2008 at 7:17 pm
My sister-in-law has been diagnosed with this “disease.” She has always been a malingerer since the first time I met her. This “disease” conveniently shows up whenever she is faced with work or a favor. We now call her illness “Fibromyalibi.” I believe her aches and pains are real. The doctors have just given her a way out with a name for her pain. We’re in our late forties and who doesn’t have aches and pains at this age. It is frustrating because everyone trys to help but she wants to hang on to her “disease.”
November 24th, 2008 at 10:17 am
A friend of mine was incapacitated with fibromyalgia for over 12 years. She ate a terrible diet and did not excercise and got worse and worse. Numerous claims to social security were denied and she was in a spiral. I asked her earlier this year to eat a diet of fruits, vegetables and chicken and fish. She lost 62 pounds and no longer argues with me that fibromyalgia is real, she now says it isn’t and that she had just grown weak. She now has her life back.
November 24th, 2008 at 8:32 pm
I’m really sorry you’re getting responses from all these over-defensive people. You’re allowed to write whatever you want, and I do believe also that FM is generally faked. BUT, it’s one of those things where the people who have it are all losers on the internet that have nothing better to do than scream and whine and cry at bloggers.
To everyone hating on this blogger, go outside and try to exercise. No more crying. Your body will thank you (BUT I HAVE FM AND I HURT AND WALKING MAKES ME TIRED I NEED MORE PILLS WAAAAAAAH)
November 25th, 2008 at 9:07 pm
*Sigh* There just isn’t any cure for stupid.
November 26th, 2008 at 5:23 pm
FM is a pigeon-hole for pain with no cause or explanation. However, when you see a disease that effects only ONE gender, and primarily one age bracket you have to seriously take a step back and look at it rationally. Is such a discriminate condition real, or is it something else entirely? My opinion is that FM is simply depression. I have to look no further into the matter than my own mother who suffered from a severe case of depression. She tried to kill herself twice, suceeded once- but was brought back. Now, she hurt - everywhere, 10/10 pain scale. Nothing worked. She was miserable in her marriage, her home life, and with all of it. That’s when it started. Doc said depression, FM, and CFS. Treated the depression, which cleared up with time and a divorce, and she feels better than ever. Cancer can disappear for no reason, and miracles happen, but for the most part diseases just don’t go away.
Long Story short. I’m sorry, but you have depression. See a doc, get some pills, change your circumstances. It works. I have appy pains when I stress out (appendix), I go drink and shoot some stuff, listen to incubus, and I’m all better. It’s all in your head, literally.
November 26th, 2008 at 7:43 pm
And FMRI imaging simply shows a hypersensitivity to stimuli interpreted by the brain. So, it is all in your head, no offense. Muscle biopsy results are laughable, because certain muscles - and certain points are going to be more dense than others. Not to mention my muscles may be more or less dense than yours as well. FM responds well to antidepressants because they address chemical imbalances in CSF, which is more likely than some kind of structural abnormality, which has not been documented. My heart goes out to you - really I do feel for those who really may have this. Maybe a cure is already out there, if not one will be soon. But, you must conceed that there are many who are riding the coat tails in hopes of Demerol.
November 28th, 2008 at 10:08 am
LOL I’ve already said I DO NOT TAKE narcotic pain killers of ANY kind. I’m NOT a drug seeker. Neither do I have any desire to become a drunk. I’m not very tolerant of people who turn to drugs and alcohol to mask their problems…they’re only adding to them, in my opinion.
I suffered a fall, not my fault. As a result I have permanent damage, pain signals and neuro transmitters short circuited, resulting in what I now have…FMS. I was also hospitalized with a severe abdominal, bacterial infection. I had to take numerous IV Antibiotics which basically destroyed my Immune System, like Chemo does to a cancer patient. Guess what? FMS is also in the Auto Immune disease family.
Drs who say that FMS is nothing more than depression are QUACKS! They haven’t bothered to get continuing education on the subject. The depression doesn’t come first…if you become depressed it’s because you’re in pain 24/7. Anyone is subject to depression who has to live like that. There’s nothing in my life that makes me miserable except the pain. I have a wonderful life, and am very happy, so that destroys your uneducated “theory.”
FMS doesn’t have to consume a person’s life, it’s manageable with a positive attitude, over the counter anti-inflammatory meds and if you suffer from depression, antidepressants. People who are malingerers, or only seeking narcotics, are going to come up with any psycho induced ailment to get a Dr to pacify them. Shame on any QUACK who does that!
My Rheumatologist told me that many of her patients that come to her saying they think they have FMS do have mental problems. However, this is NOT the case for EVERYONE. I think it’s pretty lame to just label all those who say they have FMS as “fakers.” Where did you get your MD?
Oh, and FYI, I’m allergic to Demerol. They tried to give that to me when I gave birth and I had an allergic reaction. I didn’t ask for it. Some hospitals and doctors are drug PUSHERS.
Many doctors who aren’t smart enough to get to the bottom of a person’s ailment and find a proper diagnosis resort to handing out bandaids. Good, caring doctors do their research and relate to their patients.
It’s obvious that many of the negative comments are from people who have had someone in their life affected by FMS, and instead of trying to be compassionate and understanding, they’ve selfishly just labeled the one who is suffering as a faker, a drug addict, and cut them down. THAT is what I feel bad about. EDUCATE yourself people. You don’t realize how ignorant it makes you sound when you make such uninformed comments.
December 3rd, 2008 at 7:22 pm
I am a 34 year old male. I was an all state athlete. I was given educational scholarships. I was accepted into a private law school. I passed the bar and have a law license. I started my own practice in 2005. I have a 3 story building I work out of and a weight room in the basement. I employ 2 other attorneys and a staff of 14 people. I have a wonderful wife and awesome 4 year old son. While I was ON VACATION in February of 2007, I started having tingling sensations in my arms. That soon moved to my back. Soon after it moved to my legs. My skin felt like I had a severe sun burn. I had spots of pain all over my body. My clothes hurt my skin when I wore them all day.
I loved my job. I loved my life. I was benching 300lbs. I am 6 foot 3 inches 220 pounds and I was in great shape. I did hurt my back in 2004 but recovered. Yes, my job is stressful at times. But I could not explain what was going on with me. Why did my skin hurt like I was in the pits of Hell? Then the pain spread to my face. My face still feels numb. I still have massive pain in my face. The pain in my joints and muscles comes and goes.
About 3 months after my skin begining to burn I decided that I would just have to live with it. However, I noticed that I was not able to workout like I used to. I was not able to lift much weight at all. I was getting short of breath. Then I started becoming exhausted, to the point, I literally could not get out of bed. I was a proud man, but my wife would have to help me from the shower to bed.
I went to several doctors, pleading with them to help me because I have a very large and successful business and I did not want whatever was wrong with me to stop me from making a living. Doctors looked at this 32 year old athletic looking man and said, there just isnt anything wrong with you. They could not explain my symptoms.
I was finally sent to someone who tested me for autoimmune disorders, MS, Lyme disease, Lupus…. All negative. MRIs, all normal.
Then I was tested for several types of cancer. All negative.
Then I was tested for heart diseases… My heart was very healthy, no plaque or blockages and my heart is working fine.
I was sent to the best docotors at the Cleveland Clinic. They had no answers other than probable fibromyalgia.
My first response and continuing response has been denial, denial, denial!!! I do not want anything to be wrong with me. I want to be that normal guy who went on vacation and when I got back I was a different person, I no longer had my health. No, I did not go to some exotic place and pick up some unknown disease.
What is wrong with me? Is it called fibromyalgia? Chronic fatigue?
The doctors tell me that when they rule out everything else, then they simply explain that it is fibromyagia.
Is this real? Is this all in my head? Well, let me explain it to you like this, let me push your face into a boiling pot of water and you tell me if the pain you feel is real. Maybe it is, maybe it is not? Why do I doubt your pain? Maybe it is because I have never had my face plunged into boiling hot water? Maybe I have no idea what it feels like to have my face burned by hot water. But when you bring your face out of that boiling hot water, I doubt you are going to try to argue that your pain is not real.
I will admit, I have never really believed in people who complained about pain and other such things. I always thought, tough it out, get through it. It was not until I started having real problems with my skin burning, pains in my joints and muscles without reason, not being able to sleep, and to top it off, becoming depressed because my life has changed.
Yes, I have to deal with people who are like I used to be, healthy and ignorant. Those healthy ignorant people should be thankful for everything that they have.
I still struggle with “whatever” is wrong with me. I don’t care what you call it. Would it make you feel better if I wore a sling? What about if I hopped around on crutches? Would you believe me then? No, you probably would not. You would be to involved in your “self” rather than to have some compassion for others.
Fibromyalgia is not selfishness. It is the exact opposite. I spend everyday trying not to be a burden on anyone. I go to work and put on a smile for my staff and my clients. Does that sound selfish? I do all I can to continue to have some sort of life. I try to still be a companion to my wife and son. People who think that I am a faker, what exactly am I faking and what is the reward for faking this illness???? Please tell me, because apparently, I am doing something wrong. Because I have had nothing but heartache and pain ever since this all started happening to me.
Why would I want to be in pain? Why would I lie and say I am exhausted? I own my own business!!!! I can come and go as I please!!!! I wish I had my health back so I could spend my time and money doing things I enjoy like playing basketball, going to the gym, running, going hiking, playing with my little boy non stop. Instead, I have to suffer in a bed. Alone. I have to live with guilt for not being able to do all the things that I want to be able to do with my little boy.
I would give anything to be my old self again. I still hold out hope that I will be my healthy self again.
There is nothing more I can do as far as being happy. I have a great job, a great wife, a great son, I have cars, trucks, a huge house, atvs, you name it. But I don’t get to enjoy all those things anymore. Why in the world would I trade all of that for a bed, are you serious????
But, I will not judge you as you have me. God will judge us all whether you believe in Him or not. All I try to do is stay positive, do what I can when I have good days, try not to overdo it on bad days and pace myself. At 34 years old, I am as successful as it can get and I can not fully enjoy the success. It is not my fault that I somehow became unhealthy. I do not smoke. I do not drink. I have never done drugs. If anything, it kind of makes you think, why didn’t I live it up and be some dope head like a bunch of people who still have their health. I know people who have smoked for 40 years and can get around better than I do, oh, but I am faking it, I forgot.
But in the end, my reward is not in this life. My reward will be when I am gone. I will have so much more to gain.
For those who suffer from whatever causes you pain, I have compassion for you. For those of you who mock those in pain, I have simpathy for you.
December 3rd, 2008 at 8:56 pm
ATTENTION! Please go here: http://www.godammit.com/2008/11/17/come-out-come-out/
Since I wrote this post, I have been diagnosed with fibromyalgia! Last night I read two new books about it.
I understand it much better now although there is much that still baffles me.
Anyone who feels hurt by this post, please accept my apology for adding to your struggle to be taken seriously.
Let me know how you are doing.
December 18th, 2008 at 1:56 pm
ITS FAKE. Its bitchy woman syndrome.
Every time I have met one of these chronic hypochondriacs, they all complain non stop about this fake disease.
Give it a rest already people and stop blaming your FAILURES on imaginary diseases
December 22nd, 2008 at 8:08 pm
Anyone who cites that the scientific community has established FM as a “disease” is only aware of half the argument.
Another good half of the medical and scientific world holds that FM represents a chronic pain disease on the spectrum of depression and anxiety disorders. Yes, the concept of “hysteria” has disappeared today, but we still don’t have any valid explanation for FM.
Moreover, any good medical textbook including authoritative rheumatology texts continue to identify the controversy of calling FM a “disease.” FM is merely a set of symptoms that have been arbitrarily grouped and given a name.
Sure, there is a community (read: cult) of dedicated researchers, writers, and media folk who follow FM, but that following does not automatically qualify FM as a disease.
I don’t doubt that some people suffer from chronic and unexplained pain. Yet if FM were truly a disease, we would have SOME possible scientific explanation, hypothesis, reproducible finding… something!
FM is nothing more than the somatic manifestation of depression, anxiety, or some other psychiatric or psychosocial disturbance — often unbeknown to the patient.
I’m not saying FM is fake, but labeling it as a valid medical disease makes FM a self-fulfilling prophecy and self-propagating condition.
January 4th, 2009 at 9:42 pm
I have always been healthy up until 9 years ago. I had somthing very traumatic happen in my life. My daughter was murdered, she had left her husband who was abussive and she and her little girl had came to live with my husband and me. I don’t want to call him her husband, so I’ll just say him. He came to my home one day (saying he wanted to visit his daughter) After my daughter’s murder we found out he had been planning this for a week. My 17 month old grandaughter and I were both there during the murder. I was trying to save my daughter from being shot. He meant that wasn’t going to happen he shot her 4 times. Believe me when I say this it wasn’t just a shooting it was a mutilation of my beautiful little girl she was only 17 years old. At first I was diagnosed with severe depression, pannic attacks, and Post Traumatic Stess Disorder. She has one sister she’s a year and 11 months older. They were very close so she had some really hard times and had some problems. Even thinking about suicide she was hospitolized twiced. very scarry already lost one thinking you may lose your only other child. About 2 1/2 yrs. ago I kept hurting at times like I had the flu but then it would go away. I noticed when I would wash dishes my arms would hurt, my back, my legs, my neck, my entire body would ache with pain. I went my Nerologist where I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia. NOW DO NOT TELL ME THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS FM . YOU HAVE NO IDEA!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WE WHO HAVE FM DON’T GO AROUND STICKING OUR NOSE INTO YOUR BUSINESS AND ABOUT WHAT YOUR PROBLEMS ARE. IM HERE TO TELL YOU FM IS VERY REAL I HAD 100 TIMES RATHER BEING ABLE TO DO THINGS WITH MY 10 YEAR OLD GRANDAUGHTER JUST LIKE HER BEAUTIFUL MOTHER WOULD HAVE IF HER LIFE HADN’T BEEN SO SELFISHLY AS YOU SAY WE ARE TAKEN FROM HER. Oh yeah just remember this talk about people and make fun about what they have be careful you may have it one day.
January 4th, 2009 at 11:50 pm
Jim -Try reading some of the comments here.
Doc -Thanks for the intelligent input.
Kim -What a terrible thing to endure. Blessings and prayers for you and your loved ones.
January 5th, 2009 at 2:44 pm
Thank you so much Sister Wolf we all need prayer more than anything! It’s not right you don’t bury your child their suppose to bury you! People talk about us the ones that have FM. Honestly you don’t know how that person feels. My eyes have been opened to things a lot more since my daughter’s murder I try to see things differently. I tell my family and friends to treat each other as if it would be the last time they would see them! Because the morning of my daughter’s murder I never in a million years thought about 3 hours after I got up that day I would go through the most horrible day of my life! Everyone needs to think about walking a mile in another persons shoes before makeing fun or saying FM or anything else for that matter is fake. Because I will tell you now what I feel is real 100% I dont want to be this way. Why would anyone want constant pain and be miserable it makes no since. I try to understand everyone’s feeling’s cause for one thing I don’t have one clue what they have gone through in their liftime. Who am I to judge I am nothing. That is the job of the most high GOD He is the one who will judge and the only one! Again thank you Sister Wolf for you prayers!!!!!