Hideous Shoes To Brighten Your Life
Earlier today, I was very annoyed by a crazy bitch who’s been taunting me online. But then I realized that if I had to go around kicking the ass of every single person I’ve somehow pissed off, I’d have no time for anything else.
Even better, I came across these godforsaken boots at Neiman Marcus, and my life was once again filled with joy. Who would buy these monstrosities?! Besides Cher and Pamela Anderson, I mean.
They are priced at $395, a small price to pay for all this grotesque ugliness! Just try deciding which pair is worse!
Tags: boots, crazy bitches
July 27th, 2008 at 7:13 pm
How funny you saw these too!!!
Saturday, we noticed them online. I threatened several friends with them as Christmas gifts.
I think that anal bleaching is a better option, myself.
xxx
July 27th, 2008 at 7:20 pm
Hahahahahaha!
July 28th, 2008 at 12:24 am
It certainly is awesome….but yeah, needs a closure of some kind!
July 28th, 2008 at 12:34 am
Uh oh, at first glance I thought you were liking these atrocious clodhoppers. They would go nicely with some acid washed jeans. Another fashion item that’s resurfaced but shouldn’t have, dontgetmestarted.
How have you been feeling? Any better?
July 28th, 2008 at 1:11 am
The first ones are clearly worse [and therefore better] because they cover every base of hideosity. They combine the intrinsic ugliness of the Ugg with heinous Kid Rock styling, PLUS they have a trite message on the back. What better way to piss your money down the drain?
July 28th, 2008 at 4:15 am
i would like to see the first pair worn by the pope. or a christian rock band
July 28th, 2008 at 4:33 am
Teh Internets are filled with crazy bitches, malware and spam.
July 28th, 2008 at 5:47 am
Yikes! Those are indeed some of the ugliest shoes I’ve ever seen.
July 28th, 2008 at 6:19 am
Somehow, the ugly black ones are more noxious than the ugly brown ones. Impressive.
July 28th, 2008 at 6:52 am
OMG I’m having such trouble choosing. Oh fuck it, I’ll buy both pairs.
July 28th, 2008 at 7:38 am
If you have to say you’re rock and roll, then you automatically are NOT. And any chance you ever had of being so is retroactively eliminated.
It’s kind of like calling something “classy.” Once you do that, it’s retroactively NOT classy.
I read your thingy on the b!tch that was up in your grill, and was all prepared to comment, but the post was gone. Might I submit that she’s got too much time on her hands. Perhaps her moments might be better spent searching for these “rock and roll” boots.
July 28th, 2008 at 8:56 am
oh…my…Neiman Marcus, seriously? you can get these at Rainbow for $14.99.
July 28th, 2008 at 2:07 pm
‘hideosity’… my new favorite word.
July 28th, 2008 at 2:12 pm
‘that bitch that was up in your grill’… I’m gonna use that too. These boots have proven to be very useful for me so far.
July 28th, 2008 at 2:14 pm
Oh no, I LIKE em!
Ugg boots come full circle. When I was a wee gal, the only people(Bogans) who wore uggies (outside the home) also wore tight jeans (candida tight) black AC-DC (preferably Bonn Scott RIP) t-shirts, plaid shirts and had an obligatory 30 pack of the cheapest ciggarettes in either the pocket of the shirt (called a flanney) or in the arm of their t-shirt.
Now that all the above (save the ciggies) are post ironic modern Kate Moss/Sienna Miller trendy. What is a bogan to do?
xx
(in truth, they actually wrote things like Bon Scott RIP on their Uggies with a black marker)
July 28th, 2008 at 2:44 pm
Susan - YES, acid-washed jeans, OR juicy couture sweatpants with the word JUICY on the butt. You should be a stylist. (Much better every day, thanks xo)
Charponaise - so true.
Miss Wombat: Hahaha
WendyB - truer words never spoken
Nag - I have to say that displaying the words LOVIN LIFE on your attire is the funniest, stupidest thing anyone could ever do
Enc - too god damn right. I like to think of ‘classy’ as a self-negating word.
Sonja - not only in my grill, but all up in my shit!
Hammie - I’m off to google “bogans”. I only know about “chavs” and “pikeys”
July 28th, 2008 at 6:41 pm
hammie speaks the truth…RIP Bon Scott on one’s ugg boots was seen as fitting tribute to a man who chocked on his own vomit! Send the crazy bitch my way, let her see what real crazy looks like.
ps are you speaking of recovery anytime soon…how are you doing?
July 28th, 2008 at 9:47 pm
I am stronger every day, Imelda Matt. Thank you for asking. xo
July 29th, 2008 at 2:28 am
I say make chip smith wear them and seriously he’d wish he’d hadn’t been born!
July 31st, 2008 at 10:22 am
UGG Boots and Ed Hardy (is that the brand?): VILE. These are THE SICKEST shoes (or should I say, “This is the sickest shoe”?) you’ve ever featured. SO SICK! New Jersey mall trash, fake-titted chicks from the Valley, fat cougars…
July 31st, 2008 at 11:08 am
Wow, Mark, I see you’re really feeling these boots.