Facebook: Feel the Hate!

Tonight, I heard my son remark about Facebook: “I find my self wondering, why are you my friend here when I fucking hate you?

So true. I went to look at my Facebook friends and I hate at least 5 of them. There are others who are complete strangers but I can assume that I’d probably hate 80% of them if I knew who they were.

It suddenly occurred to me that I might find my husband’s ex on Facebook, but no such luck. I only found her teenage son, who is throwing a gang sign in his profile photo and has 657 friends. YAY!

How many of your Facebook friends do you hate? And which nemesis has disappointed you by not being there?

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32 Responses to “Facebook: Feel the Hate!”

  1. Juri Says:

    I must find more people to hate on facebook! My ex-wife and I were “friends” there for less than an hour after a period of 10 years with no contact whatsoever. It’s amazing how much spite, bitterness and verbal abuse in form of personal insults you can share in such a short time when you really put your heart and the best part of your soul into it. Of course, we both knew each other’s “buttons” so well that it was easy to catch up in ’08 from where we left in ’92.

    But she’s not on my list anymore, so she does not count. Although I do hate her. Before our facebook encounter I hardly remembered she existed, but now I still find myself saying aloud, “I fucking hate you, you arrogant cunt,” everytime I remember her.

    There are others I used to “hate” and make fun of, like a couple of old colleagues, but they have nothing on her. Besides, now that we don’t work in the same office, and I don’t have to see them every day (or ever), the hatred seems to have gone as well. All that is left is the occasional “thank God I’m not that person” at their pictures or status updates.

    If I had any relatives on my list I’d probably hate more broadly and effectively. Sadly, my only flesh-and-blood relative on facebook is my cousin from my father’s side and there is no way I could hate him. We have always gotten along well, and he is even more popular among the relatives than I am. We have agreed ages ago that we are the only sane people descending from our late grandfather. The fact that we were both banned from his funeral 20 years ago made us even more convinced of that fact.

    Amendment to my New Year’s Resolution: In 2010 I will find more people to hate.

  2. David Duff Says:

    Alas, I don’t have any ‘Facebook’ friends but if I did I might worry occasionally how many of them secretly hated me?

    (Sorry, I’ve just re-read that and it’s bollocks. Nobody hates me, I’m too nice, and if they did I wouldn’t give a fig!)

  3. Iron Chic Says:

    I have tons of “friends” I don’t know for promotion reasons (barf)
    and if they start status-updating to death I hide, hide, hide!
    Hiding is the secret to a tolerable facebook experience.

  4. Cream Puff Says:

    on a different note: in sea’s new posting she claims that one of her causes in life is “supporting other bloggers”. humm…

  5. Faux Fuchsia Says:

    I Love the word Nemesis. It’s up here with Stalwart, I adore it.

    Meanwhile Mrs Aldridge has done a many pictured post on her pink fluffy Chanel jacket. Have you seen it?

    Best Wishes from the Antipodes Wolf Sister Person, FF x

  6. arline Says:

    I like facebook, and I don’t have any friends that I hate, though I do have many that I don’t know.

    I have deleted one person, as he and his comments started to feel creepy, and I may delete another person, who has tried to send me some youtube videos, that I have no interest in.

    Creeps will be deleted period.

    I have had some old people that I was once close to and fell out with, contact me, and we have made amends, and have been glad to reconnect, Then there have been those, that I wanted to reconnect with, that have been disappointments.

    I have a bunch of friends that I don’t know, and wonder why I have them..,

  7. Dru Says:

    I don’t have Facebook ‘friends’ I hate since I know them all in real life and like them, but I do get a fair few friend requests from people I absolutely despise and want nothing to do with (these, of course, are never accepted).

    I’m dreading my move into full-time employment and the inevitable Facebook-mad co-workers who will probably be mortally offended if I do not add them as ‘friends’. It’s just that I don’t give a fuck and I don’t want to see their endless bloody Farmville updates.

  8. my favorite and my best Says:

    i can honestly say i don’t hate any of them..but then again i don’t know half of them really…so yeah..probably hate a good bit.

  9. boops Says:

    i only have 5 facebook friends, sad, but i love each and every one of them. (i have de-friended, and not accepted friend requests from others though; i don’t stand on ceremony)

  10. Ginger Says:

    I strongly dislike facebook – I feel like once you join, you can never leave. That said, my hubs ex-wife added allllll of my hubs in-laws (his brothers wife, sisters husband). It was so wonderfully creepy, I have to admit that I enjoyed how blatantly stalkerish she was being. After over ten years, you would think she’d have moved on (after all, she left him!)

    Other than that, I find facebook depressing. Seems like everyone I really admired/thought was cool still lives in their parents basements.

  11. Jill Says:

    I’m not on facebook much and I only “friend” my real friends or business aquaintances. I’m always dumbfounded by people I went to high school with, whom I was never remotely friendly, trying to “friend” me. If we didn’t like each other then, why would they think I’d want them to know anything about my life now?

    I’m off to facebook right now…let’s see who I can delete!

    I may have used “whom” wrong…I’m sure you’ll let me know!

  12. Jill Says:

    Wow…I deleted 11! Apparently I was out of control in my friend curating.

  13. Aja Says:

    I won’t add people if I don’t like them, especially people from high school. I’ve grown up, but I haven’t changed that much. I still don’t suffer fools and still listen to Portishead Dummy pretty regularly. The aesthetic difference is that I am now thinner with a pretty decent wardrobe. But we all know that’s not grounds for friendship. I’m also a hell of a lot happier with myself. And I think people gravitate towards that aspect. But I’m not willing to spread myself too thinly with those I don’t trust or care about, I’d rather pour that love and attention into those I actually love.
    My general rule of thumb is: if I wouldn’t go out for a beer with you, there is absolutely no need for us to be Facebook friends. This goes for friends, family and coworkers. If I don’t like you enough to spend any of my free time with you, there is no way I feel like reading your stupid status updates.

  14. WendyB Says:

    I don’t hate my friends, but I would hate it if my ex-friend’s drug addict daughter took down her dumb Facebook page. I love to feel the hate for both of them when I feast my eyes on that stupid shit.

  15. Ann Says:

    I have grown to hate people I initially thought I liked on Facebook, once I started seeing more of their lives. There are a few people that began as being perfectly tolerable, but then wrote something ridiculous or made duck face in a picture, thus making me realize that they suck and I hate them.

  16. honeypants Says:

    The people I TRULY hate, like hate enough to do physical injury to — I have them blocked. I don’t want to know anything about them, because the hate is more than I can handle. And there are only two of them.

    But there are people I think are complete idiots and morons that I’m friends with. Just a few. And some I don’t know who are growing increasingly annoying. And some I do know who I’m currently on the outs with (even if they are unaware of the fact). I think it’s time to prune the annoying strangers though. Thanks for the reminder.

  17. Suspended Says:

    I’ve never created a Facebook account and never hear anyone talk about Facebook in a way that I find ‘healthy.’ The neurotic are a thousand times more neurotic. The nosy a thousand times nosier….blah,blah.

    Why be arsed? If someone is your friend, do you really need to see their stats. Surely you know them already. Perhaps I’m missing the point, for it all seems very pointless to me.

    I think I hate anyone who ever created a Facebook account. Self absorbed, nosy, neurotic, sadistic shitheads. Stop volunteering every detail of your unrelieved existence to total strangers. It’s weird! (but sometimes, fucking funny.)

  18. Eliza Says:

    I am a Facebook voyeur for the most part. My contributions are just political rants and new material from my favorite bands. (Midlake on NPR’s First Listen right now, by the way.) I really hate this pretentious barista I used to work with at a bookstore, one who changes personalities and interests with each new boyfriend, but my mockery is usually tinged with guilt. She turned out more interesting than I expected.

    Another is a boy I dated for three days in high school before coming to my senses, who reposts Fox News headlines and makes statements like, “Press 1 for English and press 2 to get the hell out of the country until you learn to speak English. Remember only two defining forces have ever offered to die for you, JESUS CHRIST and the AMERICAN SOLIDER. One died for your soul, the other for your freedom.” His brand of jingoism and ignorance is always a laugh riot. Had to block him from my profile, though, as he’s the type to climb a clocktower with a rifle someday.

  19. Eliza Says:

    I hear what you’re saying, Suspended, but so many of my acquaintances take Facebook seriously that I miss out on important things if I don’t check in every so often. They take it for granted that everyone is already signed up. I learned my uncle was in the hospital long before his wife called because my cousin had it in their status.

    It’s a shame, but it’s there.

  20. TL Says:

    I completely agree with Suspended. Facebook is like a mind numbing “christmas letter” for all the people that you don’t really care enough about to actually talk to. It sucks. I am quitting!

  21. Make Do Style Says:

    I love Facebook where else can you stalk with no shame and laugh aloud in the comfort of your own home. My only possible nemesis value ex bf got married recently and how smug did I feel at seeing how badly all these people I used to know had ages and how nothing had changed. Much relief spread over me at the wiseness of my choice in the face of counsel against such a move.

  22. Deni Says:

    I have about 40 friends (family) and I don’t hate any of them. I don’t allow people I don’t know access to my facebook (expect for three that I have never met but stopped at three). I write some pretty awful poetry, so why would I share that with hundreds of strangers or coworkers. I only expose my friends and family to the detritus I post. I’ve deleted one x-co-worker-friend-type-human for being a right wing conservative and making stupid remarks. My son refuses to have a facebook and I don’t blame him. There is facebook suicide program and even a suicide undo in case you want to play dead for a while and then get revived. For me, it’s better than TV when I bored out of my gourd, and it’s also a good way to keep in touch with family and friends thousands of miles away.

  23. gretchen Says:

    to me, hating is a waste of my energy because i am giving that ‘hated’ person some control over me just in the fact it bothers me to any extent. it’s much better to feel NOTHING towards someone. like your ex. they are less than nothing if they can’t touch you emotionally. that’s one i have to keep in mind when the bastard sneaks into my thoughts.

    that said, i have friended some people from high school on facebook that i don’t like and weren’t nice to me…just because i still look good and they got fat and/or look really old. small but satisfying revenge, but no hate.

  24. Sarah P Says:

    FB is Hotel California – you can check out any time you like, but you can never leave (and trust me I keep trying).

    I’m a total fucking Facebook compulsive. A tiny part of me persists in believing my devastatingly witty and erudite status updates are earning me the status of legend in my own time*.

    Quite a lot of people I mildly despise lead punishingly dull lives (you know, where there’s 443 photos of their plug-fugly kids opening ninety-seven plastic toys at Christmas with exactly the same glazed empty expression, and the highlight of their week is getting their skunk-stripe highlights re-touched before heading to All Bar One for Stacey’s hen night), so I read ‘em to feel more int’resting…

    *Prolly not though, let’s be honest.

  25. Andra Says:

    I’m with Suspended. Who needs this crap?

  26. Nic Says:

    Not sure, I’d need to check my “blocked” list

  27. Liz! Says:

    Suspended and I are in the same boat.

    When I was a freshman in college, Facebook was just starting to get really big (y’know, when it was still just for college students?). All of the freshmen got one in a frenzy to make friends with people…but I didn’t. My equally “fuck society” roommate and I swore to never get Facebooks. I spent the next 4 years explaining to people on campus that they can COME FIND ME IN MY DORM ROOM. Or call me. Hell, e-mail’s good too.

    So, now I’m out of college, and someone said “Hey, L, did you know that S just got a Facebook?” Traitor! I am appalled. If there is someone I hate on Facebook, it’s probably her only for that reason.

    Otherwise, I’m sure my narcissistic high school nemeses are on Facebook too. They qualify. I’m glad that I don’t have a Facebook, because I’d be too tempted to read their self-absorbed profiles and check out their drunken pictures (i.e. all their pictures). I won’t deny my obsessive personality- I just keep it in check better than most. :)

    …..Actually…..the annoying “WHY DON’T YOU HAVE A FACEBOOK?” hasn’t stopped yet. It scares me how some people are so crazed by it.

  28. NetochkA Says:

    I have a “friend” I hate so much that I finally had to hide her status updates because reading them would throw me into a fury. Of course I couldn’t delete her because I always seem to need to know what she’s up to so I can continue hating her. It’s a vicious cycle.

  29. Aja Says:

    Okay, I lied. There were definitely a few people I hate on my facebook friends list. I deleted them promptly. Thanks for reminding me to be vigilant in this exercise.

  30. Jules Says:

    There are definitely more than a few “friends” of mine on FB that I don’t like, and a couple that I can’t stand who happen to be my hubby’s friends that are girls. I hate that shit. Just because you were friends with my husband before we got married, doesn’t mean I want to be your friend. Go suck a dick and stop posting about all the stupid crap you do like people actually care. Wow. Guess I have some deleting to do.

  31. Marmalade Wombat Says:

    Interesting. Sometimes I look at the number of friends I have on fb and feel consolled that I know so many people (sad I know). But then again, people reply to your fb messages in order to get more messages so they look more popular. So it’s all artificial ‘social-ness’. I don’t think I hate anyone but I am maybe indifferent to many of them and have forgotten who the rest of them are. However, I daresay that goes both ways and there are others who are indifferent/have forgotten me. And that idea makes me hate myself! I’m on a fb purge now. Begone evil thing!

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