Scary, icky and risky: Let’s Do it

I-BRITE   Eye Whitening is a new cosmetic procedure if your eyes seem kind of blah. Maybe the whites of your eyes aren’t as bright and flawless as a toddler’s. But why should you suffer this indignity?!  Why not have those tiny veins and  microscopic discolored spots removed with the outer   layer of your eyeball!

Some eye doctors are against this procedure on the grounds that it is risky, impermanent, and long-term affects are not known. But what the hell, looking youthful is critical in today’s competitive environment. Don’t lose that promotion or hot date because of dingy eyes!

Find out more at this website where you can watch a video of the procedure. ( I can’t but maybe you’re less squeamish.)

It’s good to know that the march toward unburdening ourselves of our original faces is moving forward at a brisk pace.

Who’s up for it?

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14 Responses to “Scary, icky and risky: Let’s Do it”

  1. Molly Says:

    That makes me feel sick. You only get one pair of eyes, treat them with some respect !

  2. Suzanne aka Punk Glam Queen Says:

    Ew. I’m too squeamish when it comes to my eyes as I had eye surgery when I was 4 and may have to have it again. This creeps me out! My neighbor has sunburned whites from not wearing sunglasses and having very light eyes. It looks nasty, kind of like the last photo but a lot more of it. While I see it as a good case for making sure you wear sunglasses that block the harmful UV rays, she might look at this as a viable option. Again, ew.
    XXX
    Suzanne

  3. Sonia Luna Says:

    Something else to be worrying about? It never occurred to me to think about how my eyes might be getting old or sunburnt, I will forgo risky surgery and invest in a pair of sunglasses instead!

  4. honeypants Says:

    Fortunately eye drops take care of all my ocular whitening needs!

  5. sheri Says:

    Blotchy skin, yellow teeth and eyes, wrinkles, cellulite, saddle-bags, jiggly triceps, stretch marks, frown lines, dark circles, pimples, moles — sounds like the un-released verse from Billy Joel’s “We Didn’t Start the Fire.”

    Sigh.

  6. Ann Says:

    Oh, I’m SURE there are no adverse side effects from this incredible eye-carving procedure. Should be perfectly fine, no?!

  7. brooklyn_codger Says:

    That third set of eyes is truly freakin me out.

  8. irini Says:

    Is there anything in our body that we can’t mess/fix or whatever?

  9. sisty Says:

    I just throw a little Clorox in mine when I need a little whitening up.

  10. Cricket9 Says:

    Oh, for fuck’s sake. Let’s just upload our brains into natural size Barbie dolls and dispose with the aging and imperfect bodies altogether.

  11. Dru Says:

    Yeah, these aging human bodies with their messed-up eyewhites and wrinkles are so inconvenient – let’s all just be perfectly shaped humanoid robots, that’s far more convenient.

  12. MRKT Says:

    Can someone just cut my head and other limbs off, I just hate how they look, and this and that. Aaaaa, is this real? Do they really whiten your fucking eyes?

  13. TheShoeGirl Says:

    Silly? Yes, but they DO look a lot better in the after photos. Imjustsayin.

  14. Liz Says:

    Ewww!! I’m kinda squeamish when it comes to eyes. Don’t fancy that or really need it.

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