Godammit, I’m Mad!

The insults never stop. ” Jeggings” seemed like a true winner in the Awful New Fashion Jargon category, easily on a par with “Shooties.”

But Stylebop has gone that extra mile with “Jeggins.”

Are they trying to kill me?!?

On the same topic, a popular blogger has recently posed the question, Should a blogger be allowed to censor or eliminate negative comments? The answer of course is, Only if the blogger is a coward or fascist. In the long thread of obsequious comments, however, fifty thousand lackeys offer some version of support, in the form of the same banal manifesto against “mean people.”

Nearly every comment includes the phrase “that being said” or “at the end of the day.”

Mean People Suck, right? It says so on the bumper sticker. As long as they don’t write “at the end of the day” though, they are a breath of fresh air compared to breathless ass-kissers. If you can’t stand up to a comment, no mater how rude or stupid, why bother blogging at all?  Just keep a personal diary and stop taking up bandwidth.

Not too long ago, I applied for a job at the Refinery 29 blog.  They offered me an interview but the job turned out to be in New York.   Reading the following post, I realize that I couldn’t write such awful prose  even with a gun to my head.  It is simply beyond my capability. Ready, set, go:

We’re no newbies to fake tattoos, though it’s safe to say that the glittery unicorns and branded stick-ons from the local bank we used to apply don’t really garner us the same cred as the ones shown on this season’s runway. Delicate bracelets and chains were drawn onto the models at SChanel, and Gaultier paired his spring line with lettered prison tats. Rodarte went for the full monty and Sharpie’d the models’ arms and necks in full Maori effect. Less permanent than really getting pricked, but still pretty badass, we have a feeling that a little hand-drawn ink will start making its way off the runway and onto your arms, chests, and legs.

Jesus, whew!

Maybe my ears are too sensitive, but this just seems aggressively bad in every way: it’s pretentious, hokey, cutesy and irritating.  Is it standard fashion writing, or is it setting a new standard?

Who wants to count the language crimes? I’ll start with the first sentence. “Garner”, “newbies” and “cred” are all unforgivable.  For extra credit, try making it even worse, if that’s possible!

Here is an awful stupid top with a horse on it, for $55 at Revolve Clothing.

If you prefer spending the big bucks on something awful and stupid, Stella McCartney nails it with this knit dress, at her online shop for $1,145.

* Do you hate to hear “price-point?” Me too! I was being ironic.