Godammit, I’m Mad!

Inspired by the mom-woman and her what-I-wore pictures, I’ve decided to share my carefully curated collection of Black Jackets.  I only had time for five of them. Believe me, this is just  the tip of the Black Jacket Iceberg. The jacket above is a leather jacket by Rachel Roy, around 4 years old. Check out the peplum thing in the back.

Here’s a wool motorcycle jacket and notice how I didn’t use “moto” in my description.

Here’s another wool motorcycle jacket that’s kind of quilted and shorter.

This one is a cashmere jacket by Richard Tyler…my very first eBay purchase. It has a beautiful embroidered lining in peach satin.

Here is the Plein Sud jacket that I got at the UCLA Cancer Thrift Shop a few years ago. I once used it to sit on at a Patti Smith concert at the pier, that’s how awesome I am.

Would you like to see some more Black Jackets? There are two more leather ones, two cotton ones, and I’m afraid to  remember if there are others.

What the hell is wrong with me? (Oh shit, I just remembered the Ann D. jacket I got from Yoox.com!) How many times do you have to buy the same thing before you feel satisfied, you know what I’m saying?

Or maybe it’s my life’s work to curate Black Jackets? I hope not.

Now tell the class what item you are doomed to keep buying. And if you choose to gush over any of my jackets, please call me “Judy”, just for fun!

Mmmmm, now this is a jacket I’d touch my face for! Why does it have to be $500? Brian Lichtenberg, can’t you please give me one for free, after all I’ve been through?

Check out this abomination: “Punk Pants” by McQ – Alexander McQueen. It’s a skirt, it’s leggings, it’s harem pants, it’s making me want to kill myself.  Shopbop, of course.

Meet Tallulah, Rumer’s sister. At 15, she snagged an internship at Bazaar magazine. Demi Moore’s deal with Satan continues to smite her children. What a fucking cunt!™

I can’t help wondering if a contract with the devil is legal and binding. Shouldn’t Demi try to get out of it, just out of common decency?

It always annoys me to be part of a trend, but I love yellow. I loved it way back when I bought Mrs. Yellow (my giant handbag, go and look for that post!) I still love yellow, but it can’t just be ‘yellow.’

I’m drawn to the bright acid yellow that hurts your eyes. It can be even be chartreuse, but it can’t be fluorescent. It can be mustard yellow, but not lemon yellow. It can’t be marigold, either. While thinking of all these yellows, I thought of how we used to define colors by our Crayola crayons. I was devastated when they changed some colors, back in the 90s.

Did you know that Crayola has a color called ‘beaver’ and a newer one called ‘inchworm?’ Eeoow!

Anyway, the leather biker jacket above is by Blumarine. It is staggering on every level, including price. I bought it, but don’t tell my husband. The dress is beautiful too, and if it’s still around when I get out of debtor’s prison, I might try to get it.