Godammit, I’m Mad!

Tonight, my sisters and I had dinner at a neighborhood Indian restaurant when suddenly, a gorgeous couple walked toward the door. My eyes bugged and out and I squealed excitedly, “Oh look, it’s Sookie and Bill!”

Anna Paquin and Stephen Moyer must be accustomed to stares and squeals. They never turned their heads. But that was okay, because I got to see how fucking stunning they are in real life. She wore shorts and high heels, and he wore a suit and an open collared shirt. They were holding hands and looked madly in love. I hope they’re both bisexual and not just Anna. I hope they’re home thinking about the gaping woman at the Indian restaurant and wondering how to get in touch with me for hot sex!

I must say that my thrill was somewhat dampened by having to explain to my sisters that Sookie and Bill are the stars of True Blood. Clearly, they won’t be invited to the hot sex.

Wendy Brandes hosted a dinner in L.A. for her blogger friends, and she wore this ring, one of her more spectacular designs. She even let me try it on!

It was a lovely dinner and everyone had a great time.

Here’s the thing that surprised me most: She is not just pretty, but stunning. I nearly fell out of my chair when she arrived. She appears to be made of porcelain, or white marble. She is small but perfectly shaped. She looks brand new, like she just came out of the box. She is a sex kitten, frankly, despite her big brain.

I nearly molested her, but since we both agreed that we don’t believe in ‘bisexuals,’ I restrained myself.

If you have money and taste, buy youself a piece of  Wendy Brandes jewelery. And try to see her in person, if you have the chance.