Godammit, I’m Mad!

Why do you have to wear Spanx when you’re pregnant? Isn’t this a time to relax and celebrate your changing body? Since everyone can see you’re pregnant, why do they need you to have a compressed ass and thighs?

I hate Spanx although I realize they are a staple of most women’s undergarments. I once tried on a pair of black spanx in my size but it was like trying to stuff an elephant into a tight spandex sandwich bag. I barely got it over my knees. I didn’t want to fight with it. I wanted it to go live at my sister’s house where it could torture her instead.

I’m not against Shapewear per se but Spanx, never. To impose Spanx on a pregnant woman is to undermine her joy in carrying a child. It’s an abomination. A nice pair of stretchy black underpants is all you need at this glorious time.

Men, do you like to undress a woman and find she is wearing Spanx? Is it too late for a new wave of post-feminists to rally to burn their Spanx?

Not too long ago, I complained about the way this model was photoshopped.

Now I’d like to complain that she appears to be starving right before our eyes.  I’m sure she is naturally thin, blah blah blah, but this isn’t natural or normal.  Doesn’t anyone over at RevolveClothing have eyes in their head? I feel so remorseful for criticizing her butt!

In my fantasy of humanity, someone would be sure to take Doll Girl aside, and urge her to get help. But no, they’re putting her in these awful clothes and snapping pictures.

While everyone goes on about full-figured models and Crystal Renn, in real life women are still trying to get smaller and smaller until they disappear. Very sad.

“I’d like to submit our wedding photo for your Museum of Fat Love. We’ve been married almost three years and the fact that we’re fat doesn’t matter. What matters is that we managed to find each other in the vast sea of strangers out there, fat and thin. We have three kids now and we’re enjoying life to its fullest.”

Who could ask for more?

The Museum of Fat Love.

This is my current favorite model at RevolveClothing. I call her Doll Girl because of her perfect doll-like face and proportions.

But today, I saw this picture and did a double-take. What the hell?! Is Doll Girl photoshopped here? Who could have such a bizarrely tiny waist? While pondering the photoshop issue, I marvelled at how thin this girl is.

Then, I looked at Doll Girl’s rear view, modeling the same dress in white, and thought, “Oh good, she’s actually fat!”

I am totally fucked up this way. It’s pretty much the same way I view my own self.  Skinny, fat, skinny fat! I blame my father as well as my culture, but the perception problem remains.

Does anyone else suffer from this crap?

Of all the style bloggers who’ve been brought to my attention recently, this one disturbes me the most.

I don’t want to link to her or hurt her feelings. I just want her to eat!

How can one become so delusional that one’s starving body looks like a pin-up girl? This blogger likes to post several pictures of the same outfit, often posing saucily in front of various landmarks. She appears to be youngish, but her face is wrinkled from starvation and perhaps bulimia.

Just the other day, my sister and I were recalling our bouts of teenage anorexia. She can remember the exact moment that she decided to lose weight. We both remember how it was triggered by our dad, whose offhand comment about her weight was devastating to a sensitive 13 year old.

I can’t remember what triggered my anorexa, but it started when I was living in a place for juvenile delinquents. I got down to 96 pounds but still worried about calories. When I ate eggs, I threw away the yolk.

When you have anorexia, the image you see in the mirror can never be thin enough. Even your bones look too fat. All you care about is being thin and staying thin. You lose all capacity for being rational about your body.

A couple of years ago, I met a girl with anorexia who was also a drug addict. She reminded me a little of my younger self, and she was like a wounded bird that I longed to protect. She confessed to me that she cried after eating an apple. I tried to explain that her thinking was distorted.  She  died from huffing, thin as a twig.

A new study suggests that the propensity for anorexia begins in utero, due to hormone fluctuations. There is also a genetic component.  Therefore, it’s not just a reaction to cultural pressure and stereotypes. Maybe it’s an issue of seeking control when you  feel powerless: If you can control what you put in your mouth, you are in charge. That is the fallacy.

I hope someone can help the poor blogger. I hope someone can reach out to her, although who knows how many people may have tried and failed.

The good thing is that once you start to eat, your brain can work again. You begin to end the struggle with your body, and the spell can be broken, just by gaining a few vital pounds.

If you’ve battled with this shit, or you have an opinion, let’s hear it!