Some helpful readers have alerted me to the Gala Darling wish list at Amazon.com, and it has been a revelation. Here I thought those wish lists were for books you wanted to read.
The list of 348 items that Gala wants is as brazen as Gala herself. It includes cosmetics, chocolate, a personal laser hair remover ($448), magazine subscriptions, soda, and oddly enough, books.
The books are deeply offensive to a literary snob like myself, so don’t make me list them. Let me just say that I’m tempted to fulfill her wish for a copy of “The Haunted Vagina” but I can’t justify spending $7.95 for a moment of perverse satisfaction.
I still can’t understand the appeal of this Gala person, aside from reveling in her awfulness. She makes me feel squeamish. The wish list business suggests a new level of shamelessness that I hesitate to even explore.
But if wish lists are okay for bloggers, I want one too. Here are the preferred items:
1. New roof (somewhere between $4000 and $7,000) Nice to have before the next rainfall!
2. Pay my medical bills from hip fracture, $2,200
3. Pay my auto insurance and gas bills.
4. Nordstrom bill minimum payment $35
5. Facial filler $600 +
Oh god, this list is no fun, no wonder I’m never invited to blogger conferences!
Gala may not want your comments but she wants a shitload of merchandise. Feel empowered to leave her a comment here. I will go first:
Dear Gala Darling, What the hell is your deal?! Why all the icky self-help books when I thought you were a self-help guru yourself? Why the hair-removal? Why the pink? And what’s up with the Nubby Twiglet? No offense, but don’t you guys have mirrors? Sorry about all the questions, just ignore them if you want, cuz I’m not gonna buy you anything, ever. Love, SW