Thong strap, zippers, folded cuffs, snaps, fake weaving, six inch heels….what, no kitchen sink?
Remember how in The September Issue, Anna Wintour cringes and says, “We don’t use [the word] bootie?” Ha. Anna, you’re too sensitive. Try saying “Moto Bootie.”
The Lana Moto Bootie by Dolce Vita. $275
A shoe that lives up to its name. Wrong on so many levels.
And yet somehow I feel that Erin Wasson would love them.They might even be worse than the Gladiator Converse. Both signal the end of civilization.
Neiman Marcus, $495
Just kidding!
When I clicked to enlarge the picture, just to be sure I wasn’t hallucinating, I was momentarily nauseated. But I like the third bullet point in the description: “Rat accent.”
$100 at Revolve.
(photo via)
DAMIEN HIRST
End of an Era, 2009
Bull’s head, gold, gold-plated steel, glass and formaldehyde solution with a Carrara marble plinth
84 x 67 5/16 x 38 5/16 inches overall (213.4 x 171 x 97.2 cm)
“The exhibition takes its title from the central sculpture in the exhibition, a severed bull’s head with golden horns and crowned with a solid gold disc. Suspended in formaldehyde and encased in a golden vitrine, this totemic sculpture acts as a powerful coda to The Golden Calf (2008). End of an Era proffers a sacrificial head, here dismembered from the majestic body of the earlier sculpture. While The Golden Calf symbolized the worshipping of a false idol, with End of an Era (2009) Hirst demystifies the biblical tale and, by extension, debunks his own myth-making.”
God, what a cunt.
Oh god, it’s a dirty job but someone’s got to do it. Here is Sea, modeling one of the hideous new pieces of jewelry that she and Mom have recently “acquired.” Funnily enough, Sea wears the giant monstrosity with an Incredible Vintage Chanel Jacket that Mom “found” on eBay.
Don’t make me show you the other monstosities pieces that Sea and Mom have “obtained” by the same designer. They are all gigantic and garish: a squid, a baboon, and a bunch of other stuff you would gladly pass up at a yard sale. A quick look at the designer’s website reveals that these items go for $500 and up.
Would you like to leave Sea a comment? Me first:
Dear Sea, You and Mom need to stop this compulsive “curating” of shoes and accessories. Could you at least not brag about it while I’m trying to watch people die in Haiti? I think you have lost your way. Bigger isn’t better, it’s just bigger. Meanwhile, here are some other words you might like – procure, appropriate, harvest, reap, and attain. Love, SW
By our friends at Tripp.
These shoes make me want to cry. They look like a pre-school project. Which is usually a good thing. But not when they cost $1,605.
How long before those cheap little rhinestones start to fall off? If shoes can feel embarrassed, this one is dying inside.
Whenever I get email updates from Pixie Market, I dutifully click to see their new arrivals, and inevitably I am horrified. It’s not the items they sell, but how they are put together. Why would anyone want any of the garments in the pictures above?
Let’s say I wanted a floppy white sweater. After seeing it as part of this horrible ensemble, ugh, forget it! Why the dead animal boots and the stupid hat?
Look at this Pixie Market girl. I can’t remember which item is supposed to be on display…the jacket, maybe?…but the horrible styling just repels me. Is the stylist blind or is she having a little private laugh?
More and more, I’m aware that it’s the styling I respond to, not the product. The styling is everything; it promotes a fantasy you want to buy into, if it succeeds. If it fails, as in Pixie Market, there’s almost no way you’ll spend your money.
Here’s some trousers I’ve been ogling for weeks. Don’t worry, I’m broke. But I’m drawn to the trousers because of the elegant no-nonsense styling. This girl says to me, “If you buy these trousers, you’ll be a young Lauren Bacall, so carefree that your shirt cuffs won’t even match! You’ll be sloppy but pulled together! You’ll get to wear your men’s shoes but still exude confident femininity!”
This brand, Hope, really knows what they’re doing. Whereas the Pixie Market people, I’m not getting their message unless it’s “Buy this stuff if you wanna look not only unsophisticated but also blind and crazy!”
Aren’t these jeans from Karmaloop breathtaking?! I would wear them just to acquire a nice diamond-shape pattern on my legs. Or to impress my friends with the little blobs of fat that stick out through the holes.
Nothing cheers me up like a browse through the wonderland that is Karmaloop. Complete this sentence:
These jeans would be great for —————————.
