Hope is a thing with feathers*….and yet this new style by Jeffrey Campbell evokes a different concept. My first thought was of something throwing up on itself.

Adding a dash of perversity, they call this color “purple” when it doesn’t take a drag queen to know it is pink.

$209, but I’m warning you, it runs narrow.

*

The PERFECT monkey fur jacket.  Now all we need is a _________.

(farfetch.com, $2,195.00)

This skirt by Kevork Kilesjian would look great with a massive viking helmet, don’t you think?

At $1,495, the price is just right, and the designer’s name suggests he may be amenable to killing you with a plastic bag.  Maybe he could even do this before you suffered the indignity of wearing the skirt!

Shopbop,  of course.

Rag and Bone Moto Pants with Removable Kilt,  $695 at shopbop*

“It’s called ‘moto’ because _________________.”

~

*Only 2 let!

Why did they stop there? Why not add zebra?

This “shoe” makes me want to cry.  $469.95 at solestruck.

This dramatic and frightening Thakoon “bustle skirt” greeted me at Shopbop this morning, only to disappear by midnight. What the fuck?!  Did it turn back into a pumpkin, or did it sell out in one day? You need to see the back view to imagine the effect you might have had, sweeping into a room or tripping and falling as the case may be.

I believe it is taffeta, and the price was around $2,000 I think.

What is the point of it? All I could think of to wear with it was a basket of fruit on the head. Maybe it’s a wry tribute to the mullet!

Well, now that it’s gone, I feel a vague sense of loss.

So let me tempt you with another great new “piece” from Shopbop:

They are sheer silk chiffon layered with matching shorts.  They would also look nice with some fruit on the head.  I like the way these gossamer pants are styled with clunky leather boots. It’s an aggressive statement that says, “I am a visionary, you know nothing!”  They are a steal at only $225.

“Not just a sandal—a work of art, a thing of beauty. This Brian Atwood sandal boasts wild leopard print, ribbons that lace up your ankle, and feathers that sway with every step.”   $1,450 Neiman Marcus

“Not just a shoe—an object of desire, a work of art. This Diego Dolcini satin showcases fan-pleated chiffon, articulated with two-tone elegance and discerning crystal embellishments.”  $2,445  Neiman Marcus

Can’t decide?

Here’s a close-up of the discerning crystal embellishments. (Can they be discerning? Why not judgmental, while we’re at it?)

And here’s the Thing of Beauty, walking back into the jungle….

These metallic pants would look great with ________________.

Sass & Bide, $561 at shopbop.

I just clicked on “women” at Need Supply and this gave me a nasty shock. I was expecting some innocent pictures of the favored Need Supply model, with the tragic doodle-pad tattoos, wearing some crappy shorts or something, then WHAM!

Jeffrey Campbell is not safe for older people with heart problems. Or people with eyes.

Represent Fringe Platform, $175

But why???

by Finsk. $999.95